Whether it's a coach, therapist, mentor, or friend, relationships are important for growth. They are how we move forward towards our goals. Nurturing relationships help us to develop resilience during the storms of life.
From birth until death, our nervous systems are how we experience life. Relationships are one of the ways we tune our nervous systems. Through 21 Days to Solo, we'll be in a real relationship. Why? Just like learning to fly a plane requires lots of practice, relationships are also a practice. The way we relate creates pathways in our brains. Relationships are fundamental to happiness, as well as emotional and physical health.
Dr. Stephen Porges, a neuroscientist, coined the term the social engagement system. He sheds light on the necessary requirements for social contact to be nourishing for our nervous systems. We subconsciously pick up on cues of safety, such as reassuring rhythm and sounds of voice, approachable posture, and friendly facial expressions, which allow the nervous system to come into a state of health, growth, and restoration.
The Harvard Study of Adult Development has been tracking a group of men for nearly 80 years. One of the key findings is that relationships, more than money or fame, is what keeps people happy throughout their lives.
In Lost Connections, Johann Hari tells how social isolation can cause more stress hormones in the body than being physically assaulted. There are more people today who don't have even one close relationship in their lives than those who do. Social disconnection may be the primary driver for an epidemic of anxiety and depression that we face today.
A meta-analysis of relationship factors in therapy showed that the quality of the therapy relationship was at least as important as the method of therapy used. With this in mind, 21 Days to Solo focuses on the relationship itself as a daily practice for growth.
As a coach, I will guide you to extract energy and wisdom from past hurts, but mostly we will be looking forward to move forward. The relationship is the method—and the most supportive relationship you can grow is with the one in the mirror. Through 21 consecutive days of practice, I will show you exactly how.
For an even deeper dive into connection, check out: